Incarnations Series aka Past Avatars Series
by Anonde
Summary: [completed] Short, not to be taken seriously, hopefully will tickle your funny bone silly Avatarfics by yours truly. Starring Avatars Roku, Kyoshi and company. Added a tribute of sorts for the 'Avatar Day' episode.
1. Much Ado About Nothing

Much Ado About Nothing

A Silly Avatarfic by Anonde

Just a short, not to be taken seriously, hopefully will tickle your funny bone silly Avatarfic.

Shortly after defeating the Fire Navy Fleet at the North Pole and before Pakku's company set sail for the Southern Water Tribe, Aang came up with the -brilliant- idea of learning firebending from Avatar Roku.

Go

- - -

"I don't know why I didn't think of this sooner. You can teach me firebending, Avatar Roku."

"Uh, Aang-"

"This way I won't have to look for Jeong Jeong or another Firebending Master to teach me firebending."

"Aang-"

"Is Avatar Kyoshi around here? She could teach me earthbend-"

"Aang!"

"Huh? What, Avatar Roku?"

His previous reincarnation sighed before gently reminding the young Avatar, "We can't do any bending in the Spirit World."

"... Oh," said Aang, deflated.

Feeling guilty for puncturing Aang's enthusiasm, Roku tried to lift up the boy's spirits by saying-

"It was not a bad idea, Aang. Just impossible," which really wasn't a very encouraging thing to say.

Roku sighed again when Aang became even more downhearted. He really wasn't very good at this sort of thing and was quite relieved when the young Avatar finally stirred out of his gloom.

"... Well... I guess I should be going back then."

"Yes, that would be good idea," said Roku perhaps a little too quickly for Aang then frowned at him.

"... Why are you in such a hurry for me to leave?"

Roku, who was a little distracted at the moment, said, "I have a Pai Sho game with Kyoshi and the others-"

"Really! That's great! I'd love to meet Avatar Kyoshi-"

"No, you can't!"

"... Huh? Why not?"

"... Because you shouldn't stay long in the Spirit World."

"... Why not?"

"... It's complicated, but really - you shouldn't stay long here, because you're not dead yet. Besides, your friends in the Living World will miss you."

"No, they won't. Katara and Sokka are waiting by my body at the Oasis."

While Roku struggled to come up with another excuse for Aang to leave immediately, the boy said, "Look, if it's about me not knowing how to play Pai Sho, don't worry. Monk Gyatso played Pai Sho with me all the time."

"But certainly not in the way Kyoshi plays Pai Sho," said Roku offhandedly. All of the sudden, he smacked his forehead the way Sokka does all the time as though he had just realized that he shouldn't have said what he had just said to Aang.

Curious and even more suspicious, Aang stared up at the tall firebender Avatar and asked, "How does Avatar Kyoshi play Pai Sho?"

"... You should go back now, Aang."

"... Hey. Wait a minute. Come back here!"

"Aang, go back. Don't follow me."

"I'm not going back until you tell me how Avatar Kyoshi plays Pai- Aah!"

Alarmed by Aang's cry, Roku whirled about only in time to see the boy's hand disappear into the murky depths of the swamp.

- - -

"**Roku, you idiot!**"

"_Calm down, Kyoshi. No use getting excited. We have to figure out a way to get Aang back from the kappas. Shouldn't be too hard. I'm certain the kappas will return Aang to us for some cucumbers._"

"**And just where are we going to get cucumbers in the Spirit World? ... Roku, where are you going?**"

"I'm going to offer myself as a trade for Aang. He has to return to the Living World soon. He can't stay here for more than-"

"Roku, that is very noble of you, but I should go instead."

"No, Aang is my responsibility."

"He's all our responsibility, but you shouldn't be the one to be traded for Aang."

"**Why not him? It's his fault.**"

"Roku has another task he must do. We don't know for certain how long it will take for us to negotiate with the kappas for Aang's release. In the meantime, one of us has to take over Aang's body and pretend to be him; otherwise, his friends and many others in the Living World will panic if he doesn't awaken. They must see that the Avatar is conscious and well, and Roku is Aang's Avatar guide and the one amongst us who knows him best."

"**Which makes this whole mess even more ironic.**"

"Now, Kyoshi. Let up on poor Roku."

"**Oh no. I will not. This wouldn't have had happened if he hadn't been so prudish about letting Aang see me play Pai Sho.**"

"... Kyoshi, you barely wear anything while playing Pai Sho."

"**It's part of my strategy.**"

- - -

"Aang, are you all right?"

Roku blinked and glanced at Aang's waterbender female friend who was kneeling beside him, seated on his sleeping furs in their room at the Northern Water Tribe.

The old firebender Avatar pretending to be the young airbender Avatar answered, "I am well, Katara. Thank you very much for your concern."

Katara's brother choked. "Thank you very much for your concern?" he repeated, staring rather beadily at their friend. "Katara's right. You have been sounding weird lately."

Realizing that his more formal speech mannerisms had made the Water Tribe siblings suspicious, Roku, his and Aang's mind racing, said slowly, "I just picked up on how Avatar Roku speaks. I like how he sounds." He felt quite pleased with his clever answer while Aang's friends glanced at each other with raised eyebrows.

It had only been a day since he had begun pretending to be Aang; Roku, quite confident that his charade was excellent despite the speech foible and the one time he had requested for fire flakes at breakfast and how he had forgotten to waterbend and wound up instead firebending into steam an enormous debris pile of huge ice chunks.

"Guess Jeong Jeong had managed to teach you at least one useful firebending maneuver," Sokka had commented in a grudging tone for Aang had just in seconds finished their entire assigned workload for that afternoon.

For a bender of his caliber, Roku however found it most awkward to pretend he hadn't yet mastered waterbending during the early morning training exercises.

After once again pretending to be unable to launch a decent counterattack against his waterbending instructor Master Katara, a tall elderly balding male waterbender came over to where they were practicing.

"Good grief. It looks like he's even worse than before."

"Aang's just tired from going over to the Spirit World two days ago, Master Pakku," said Katara quickly in defense of her friend and pupil. Roku had already decided that he liked her and thought that Aang was very fortunate to have such a friend. He wasn't yet certain about of her older brother, Sokka.

Pakku grimaced. "That was a foolish endeavor, Katara. Really, the two of you should start using your brains more often. You should have consulted your elders beforehand. Crossing over to the Spirit World isn't a trifle matter, even for the Avatar and most especially since he hasn't even mastered a simple ice shield maneuver."

Despite that he had only personally known the loud-mouthed waterbending master for not even a minute, Roku was quite decided in that he didn't like Pakku, who then told Katara that he would be training the Avatar one-on-one from now on.

"We only have a few days left before we leave the North Pole, and you're obviously being too soft with him," he declared before, without even a warning, launching a water jet straight at the boy's chest, knocking Roku back to land painfully and in a very undignified manner on Aang's rear.

- - -

"... Aang, that was incredible. What's that maneuver called? I've never seen that be- ... Master Pakku, no! Wait! Don't do -that- yet! Let me get away from Aang first!"

All in all, Roku was very happy when the other incarnations finally got Aang back.

- - -

Stop


	2. Buttinskis

Important - each Avatar's dialogue is marked differently. Apologies for the strange presentation; I had originally intended to color-code but fanfictiondotnet doesn't allow colored text. (sad)

Avatar Roku - plain text  
**Avatar Kyoshi - bold text**  
_Male Waterbender Avatar - italicized text_  
Female Airbender Avatar - underlined text

"Buttinskis" by Anonde

This is about what would happen if Aang asked for advice from his previous incarnations on how to woo Katara.

Go  
- - -

"Just tell her you like her, Aang."

**"No, that never works. Sweep her off her feet."**

_"Give her a betrothal necklace."_

"Flowers. Give her flowers. Girls love flowers."

"... Aang, just get a nice bouquet of flowers. Give it to Katara and tell her you like her."

**"And just what's wrong with our suggestions, Roku?"**

"Kyoshi, we want to assist Aang in wooing Katara, not scare her away."

_"I'll have to agree with Kyoshi on this. The direct way is always the best."_

"No, it isn't. I'm with Roku. Girls like to be courted."

**"Not all girls. Courtship is a waste of time."**

"No, it isn't."

**"Yes, it is."**

"Love needs time to grow."

**"Of course it will take time if you dawdle about it."**

_"Good grief. She's from the Water Tribe, remember? Aang, just carve her a betrothal pendant. She'll understand right away."_

"They're too young to get married."

_"It's a -betrothal- pendant."_

"It's the same thing."

_"No, it isn't."_

"Aang, ignore them and just go."

**"Roku, don't you go telling Aang to ignore us. Being his Avatar Guide doesn't make you his only advisor."**

"Aang, just go."

- - -

"Uhm... Katara?"

"Yes? ... Oh, these are lovely."

Aang turned red as a tomato when Katara planted a kiss on his cheek as thanks.

"What's the occasion though?"

"... Huh?"

"I mean why are you giving me flowers. It's not my birthday or anything."

"Oh! Uh... No occasion. I just wanted to give them to you because... I like you."

"... Oh. Well, I like you too, Aang. Thank you, really."

And the two youngsters lapsed into a very uncomfortable silence.

- - -

**"I told you it wouldn't work."**

- - -  
Stop


	3. Even in the Spirit World

Important - each Avatar's dialogue is marked differently. Apologies for the strange presentation; I had originally intended to color-code but fanfictiondotnet doesn't allow colored text. (sad)

Avatar Roku - plain text  
**Avatar Kyoshi - bold text**  
_Male Waterbender Avatar - italicized text_  
Female Airbender Avatar - underlined text

"Even in the Spirit World..." by Anonde

Start  
- - -

_What do you mean that you want Aang to end up with Azula?_

I only said that I wouldn't mind if Aang became interested in Azula.

_You're being ridiculous. She's the enemy. Besides, it's obvious that Aang will end up with Katara._

I was just stating a preference. I was a firebender after all.

_Well, I was a waterbender. Aang will be with Katara. End of discussion._

... Why not let Aang be with an airbender?

_Because there aren't any oth-_

(gloom)

**Now, now. Don't cry. Just ignore them. They're idiots.**

(sniffs) ... Thanks, Kyoshi, but this is an important matter. Aang has to marry someone someday. What about you? Who do you want Aang to marry? ... Since you were an earthbender, I guess you'd want him to be with Jojo.

**And Suki and Koko and Meng and Jun and Yue- Oh wait, she's already the Moon Spirit... and Ty Lee and Mai... Plus Katara and Azula. ... Hmm... did I miss anyone? ... Oh, yes. That girl Song or was it San. ... I think that's all... for now.**

(bewildered, _confused_ & puzzled)**  
**

**What? Don't look so surprised. Aang's the -last- airbender, remember? He's going to need a harem in order to repopulate the Air Nomads.**

- - -  
End


	4. The Blue Spirit

Important - each Avatar's dialogue is marked differently. Apologies for the strange presentation; I had originally intended to color-code but fanfictiondotnet doesn't allow colored text. (sad)

Avatar Roku - plain text  
**Avatar Kyoshi - bold text**  
_Male Waterbender Avatar - italicized text_  
Female Airbender Avatar - underlined text

Summary: What the Incarnates thought when they found out that Zuko was the Blue Spirit

Go  
- - -

I like that Zuko. He's actually a nice person.

_No, he isn't. He's just like that loud-mouthed Zhao. They're both only after Aang._

But Zuko still saved Aang.

_He used Aang as a body shield, remember?_

(frustrated) Roku, Kyoshi, what do you two think of Zuko?

Zuko is a good person.

(beams) There, see?

_Oh please... Roku's obviously biased._

Kyoshi?

**(staring off into the distance with a dreamy expression on her face)**

_(gags) You three are INSANE!_

**(blinks) What? What? Who's insane?**

_You are! I can't believe you're actually fantasizing about that boy!_

**(blinks again) What boy?**

_Zuko!_

**(blinks for the third time)**

_(gets smacked by a fan)_

**I'll have you know that I prefer -men-.**

... Zhao?

**Those Yuuyan Archers.**

- - -  
Stop


	5. Jun

(responding to question-type reviews)

**DSK** said, "Do I really need to tell you to keep up the good work or that Kyoshi is my Fav avatar because of you."

Me: Yes, you have to tell me. I'm not a mind-reader, you know. 8)

**Deamon Fire** said, "Is Kyoshi on something?"

Me: Well... she is partial to Ginseng Tea... it has certain very interesting side effects. XD However; seriously, just think of her as the sort who has a very blunt way of speaking whatever's on her mind. I thought it would be fun to give the Incarnations very different personalities.

---

To everyone who reviewed, thank you thank you. 8) Also, I would appreciate it if you let me know which chapter least amused you or not at all.

Yes, you read that right. I want to know which chapter is the least funny or not at all for you. You don't have to explain why; just point out which one. And don't worry - my ego is pretty tough or flexible. Have to be if I want to survive in the hospitality industry.

As they say, one of the best ways for a writer to improve is to know where improvement is needed. I'll start off: What I don't like the most is this one, the 5th. Yeah, this one gave me a lot of trouble. Edited it so many times I'm sick of it. Still, here's hoping it will tickle your funny bone even slightly.

Avatar Roku - plain text  
**Avatar Kyoshi - bold text**  
_Male Waterbender Avatar - italicized text_  
Female Airbender Avatar - underlined text

Summary: What the Incarnates thought of Jun, the Bounty Hunter.

Start  
- - -

Oh no. It will be so much harder for Aang and his friends with that bounty hunter helping Zuko track them.

_... True, but it should encourage Aang to be more on his toes._

(slowly) I agree.

? (stares aghast at the two male Avatars) ... Don't tell me you two like her!

_(defensively) Well, you said you like Zuko._

(stumped) ... Kyoshi, help me out here-

**(looks contemplative)**

? Oh no, not you too!

**(is disturbed) Huh?**

(is in despair)

_(is smirking)_

(is curious) You are also intrigued by the bounty hunter, Kyoshi?

**Hmm? Oh. I was just wondering if she uses that whip for anything else.**

- - -  
End


	6. Chapter 6

First, thank you thank you to those who reviewed. 8)

Second, just want to make something crystal clear - I -LUV- the Kataang ship, seriously honestly and truthfully. I just found out very recently that it seems like I was making fun of Aang x Katara. Nothing can be further from the truth; I'm even working on a Kataang fic myself.

Third, a few feedback replies.

**Hopless Romantic Kitty** said, "Did you mean what I think you meant?"

Me: (grins) Whether or not the AtLB creators intended it, Jun does look like a dominatrix. XD And I make the observation with all due respect. I do think Jun is an interesting character.

**Deamon Fire** said, "You should give the other two Avatars names. It would make things much easier to understand."

Me: I do want to, but those two other Avatars are (nameless) canon characters which have been introduced in the series during the episode 'The Avatar State'.

Fourth, just a little heads up. This is the second to the last chapter. Expect about a dozen conversations in the 7th chapter.

Fifth, if you're going to review - will appreciate it if let me know which you think is the least funny or the unfunniest conversation so that I can dissect and try to figure out how to improve it. For now, I think the last two conversations in this chapter are the weakest in the entire collection thus far. Felt old to me, but still am crossing my fingers and a-hoping they still tickle some funny bones.

---

Avatar Roku - plain text  
**Avatar Kyoshi - bold text**  
_Male Waterbender Avatar - italicized text_  
Female Airbender Avatar - underlined text

Summary: Avatar conversations during the finale of Season One and through the first four episodes of Season Two.

Start  
---  
At the North Pole  
---

... Aang will be here soon. Are you all certain none of you know who the Moon and Ocean Spirits are?

_(bothered) I was a waterbender, but even I don't know that._

(worried) ... What are we supposed to do then?

... I suppose I'll have to ask Koh. ... Where is Kyoshi?

She said she had to go get something.

_Nevermind her. Roku, it's no good going to Koh youself. He'll never tell you or any of us what we need to know. You know how he is._

... He's right. Koh will just waste our time playing mind games with us. ... Aang would have a much better chance getting him to talk. Koh always underestimates children, but... we can't just let Aang face him...

_Can you think of another idea?_

... Aang's here.

_... We've no choice, Roku. You'll have to send Aang to Koh. Make sure he knows just how dangerous Koh is. We'll just have to put our faith in the boy._

Good luck, Roku, and may the Spirits keep Aang safe.

(leaves)

_... Where is Kyoshi anyway?_

She went to get-

_Never mind. It was just a rhetorical question._

(while the three incarnations waited tensely for Aang to climb out of Koh's lair, Kyoshi finally returned)

**You just sent Aang in there!**

There was no other way, Kyoshi... Koh is the only one who knows who are the Moon and Ocean Spirits.

**(is impatient) I know that, but I wanted Aang to have this! (holds out a package)**

... What is that?

**A mask, you idiots!**

---  
Stop  
Go  
---

---  
On the way back to the Earth Kingdom  
---

**... I have a very bad feeling about this.**

... You mean about Aang having nightmares when he's in the Avatar State?

... It is a warning.

_... Oh no, not again... they're going to run into an imbecile who thinks the Avatar State can be used as a weapon, aren't they?_

_**(multiple sighs of dread)**_

---  
Stop  
Go  
---

---  
In the Cave of the Two Lovers  
---

Hmm... I should remind Aang that he can at the very least firebend a flame.

**No.**

**You heard Katara. They're going to kiss. If you remind Aang he can firebend a light for them, they might not kiss.**

_She's right. Not a word to Aang, Roku._

... But they're frightened out of their wits.

**They'll be fine for just a few moments in the dark.**

(**_hold breaths in anticipation as Aang and Katara lean towards each other_**... darkness falls; crystals light up)

**... Did they kiss?**

_... I don't know._

(wishing they were some place far away from the other two incarnations)

---  
Stop  
Go  
---

---  
At Omashu Again  
---

That Fire Nation baby is so adorable! ♥ I can't wait when Aang has children of his own.

Fire Nation children are always adorable.

_Water Tribe kids are cuter._

... I do not desire another argument with you about who Aang should be with.

_Well then, you should stop with the hinting._

Hinting?

_Fire Nation children are always adorable?_

It is true.

_Well, it's also true that Water Tribe kids are cuter than Fire Nation brats._

They are not brats.

_Juveniles then._

(glares at _each other_)

(thinking that Aang's children should be airbenders)

**(thinking that Aang should have several complete sets)**

---  
Stop  
Go  
---

---  
In the Swamp  
---

(is happy happy happy)

_? What's she so happy about?_

**She thinks an airbender made that twister.**

... That does seems plausible.

(very excited) I also think that girl Aang dreamt about is an airbender! I really -really- hope so.

(smiles slightly) I assume you want her and Aang together.

Yes!

_... But Aang likes Katara._

I know, but they're both still very young. They may just fall in love with other people, and it would be so nice if Aang's with another airbender.

_(cannot complain)_

(feeling very smug)

**(is mentally adding to list of eligible candidates for Aang's harem)**

---  
End


	7. Chapter 7

(sighs) Sorry, everyone. I reviewed/reedited/rewrote those dozen or so conversations I mentioned before and I just can't do it - I can't post them. I just don't find them funny enough. All I can present to you now is the one conversation that managed to passed my nitpicky brain. May it make the corners of your mouth twitch even a little.

On Feedback - knowing what other people think is funny, _not so funny_ and not at all funny is **precious** to me. I have been making a guide of sorts from readers' feedback of this series. If I ever make more Avatar conversations, I'll be using that guide to... uh... guide me.

Replying to feedback:

**kittyda1stmate** - I dont get it? what did Master Pakku do? (chapter 1)

Me: He and Roku (in Aang's body) got into a very big waterbending fight. 8)

**Hopless Romantic Kitty - **Do you think that they did kiss in the cave?

Me: I really don't know. XD

**Liselle129 -** since time is meaningless there, if she was an airbender, she could well be his daughter

Me: Woah... I -like- your theory. Yeah, I think that is very possible. 8)

**ardy1** - So why didn't this appear on lj - or did I miss something? And did you just have to of the incarnates considering sex with each other? Somehow, given they all share a spirit, that seems a bit twisted.

Me: (cannot think of an answer)

Avatar Roku - plain text  
**Avatar Kyoshi - bold text**  
_Male Waterbender Avatar - italicized text_  
Female Airbender Avatar - underlined text

---  
Start  
---

(feeling very sad and depressed)

_(tries to cheer her up) At least there are people living at the Northern Air Temple. They think of it as home._

(still very gloomy)

(tries as well) They did manage to defend the temple against the invasion force. I do not think there will be another attempt anytime soon.

(feels even more down)

_(sarcastic) Oh great, Roku. You just had to go and remind her that there may be another Fire Nation attack._

(defensive) That was not my intention.

**(tut tuts and addresses the sad airbender Avatar) Didn't that machinist say that they're adding a bathhouse to the temple?**

(blinks and gives Kyoshi a surprised look) ... Yes.

**You like baths, don't you? Everyone likes baths.**

... Yes.

**Good. It's settled then. We're going to that new bathhouse that everyone's been talking about.**

_Huh?_

... You mean the one that Yubaba opened last week.

**Yes, that's the one.**

_... Good luck. That place is always full, and they say they're booked til next season._

You tried to get a reservation?

_I did. No good. Yubaba's prioritizing gods and goddesses for now and that's just for reservations._

**I have reservations.**

_(is stunned)_

... You do?

**(nods nods) It wasn't easy; I had to call in a favor with that old crone. You'll come with me, right? You two also.**

Of course.

_You don't have to ask me twice. I've been wanting to see for myself if that bathhouse is as great as they say it is._

**Good. It's settled then.**

**---**  
While waiting in line at the very crowded bathhouse  
---

... Kyoshi?

**Yes, Roku?**

... You did reserve two baths, right?

**Why should I?**

---  
End  
---

Yes, ladies and gentlemen. Avatar Kyoshi doesn't believe in _bath segregation_. Were you surprised? As for what happens next, I leave it up to your imagination and kudos if you know who Yubaba is and if you don't - I highly -highly- recommend Hayao Miyasaki's Spirited Away, which I love to bits and pieces.


	8. Interviewing the Incarnations

Just a little tribute for the 'Avatar Day' episode that came out last April 28, 2006.

Avatar Roku - plain text  
**Avatar Kyoshi - bold text**  
_Male Waterbender Avatar - italicized text_  
Female Waterbender Avatar - underlined text

---

An Interview with Avatars Roku, Kyoshi and company

---

Interviewer: Thank you for your time, Honored Avatars. Let's begin, shall we? May we know who is your favorite character?

Aang.

**Aang, of course.**

_Aang. Who else?_

It has to be Aang.

Interviewer: ... Okay... Uhm.. since Aang is technically... also the four of you, let's just disqualify him, all right?

Very well. That seems reasonable. In that case, I would have to say Zuko.

**Those Yuuyan Archers for me.**

_I pick Katara._

Sokka or Iroh. I can't decide who is funnier.

Interviewer: Thank you very much for your answers. Now, for the next question - who is your least favorite character?

(immediately) General Fong.

**(looks as though she has a migraine) Fong.**

_(looks as though he has a toothache) That idiot Fong._

(is very outraged) I still can't believe he said -that- to Aang!

Interviewer: ... Said what to Aang?

(flinches)

**(is beginning to shake her head wildly) No, don't say it. I can't stand it.**

_(winces)_

(is infuriated) I.DON'T.SEE.GLOWING.

(hides face with sleeve)

**(goes away)**

_(is shaking his head with eyes squeezed shut and hands tightly clamped over his ears)_

(is furiously yelling at the innocent interviewer) How could he say such an obscenely ridiculous thing to Aang!

Interviewer: (has no choice but to cut the interview short since all four Incarnations had obviously been traumatized during the Season Two premiere)


End file.
